7 years ago I was constantly crying and I couldn’t tell anyone why. I was in and out of the doctors every week for 2 months regarding other health issues. It took quite a few appointments before I finally said that I needed help with the way I was feeling. I didn’t want to live any more and felt that people would judge me for saying how I felt (the reason why I kept it hidden for so long)
I was diagnosed with severe depression and anxiety caused by years of bullying and the grief caused when I lost my grandad.
I was sent to an NHS counsellor who said the reason why I was feeling the way I did was just because I have a disability during the 6 session he made me feel worse about myself and that I actually just needed support which he couldn’t give me. 2 weeks later I was sent to a group session talking about getting my life back it was for people who have experienced bereavement and how to regain control of their lives by getting out the house and seeing friends something that I felt I couldn’t do due to transport issues and the fact that I didn’t know who I could really trust and that the few friends who I could really trust lived far away. I also still didn’t want to leave the house by myself
I then met my empowerment coach at a wheelchair tennis tournament but it took me several months and a lot of strength and courage to finally ask her for help. She agreed to help me due to everything that I have been through in my life.
She has never judged me for being me and has given me time to be able to offload everything that I have needed to on a weekly basis ( it’s different for everyone) and if I have a blip she is just a phonecall or text away. We have also worked on the tennis court because I felt like giving that up as well because I wasn’t been listened to
It’s scary and exciting to look forward to the future now , I have a lot to look forward to now that I have found the right support and that I do actually have a future ahead of me and that I am able to deal with things a lot better than ever before
If you need help don’t be afraid to ask its changed my life and I know now its ok not to be ok all the time
